I had a friend recently chat with me about a
situation that was happening in their life with a mutual friend not being
supportive. When I presented a few different ideas - asked some questions
on the other person's perspective - I heard "Oh, no, I know they are
blowing me off!" I stepped back and thought "Wait, there may be
some assuming going on here." There was no evidence to suggest that
was happening but my friend was positive this is what was happening.
How hard is it for us to put ourselves in someone
else's shoes? There are days those shoes have no way of fitting our feet
so we certainly aren't going to take a walk in them.
We decide, when a situation is presented to us,
that based on our filters, expertise, education, experiences and much more,
that HAS to be the way it is.
What we fail to realize is that there are many different perspectives to what
has happened. Yes, a "right" and "wrong" can be
determined if necessary but there can also be many, many sides to the same
Part of our listening or experiencing an issue can be, instead of jumping into
"oh this is the way it is", is to step back and consider the other
side. How does the other side feel, process, experience? Where are
they coming from? Does their experience have merit? Sure.
By turning the situation around like we'd look at a
stone or a crystal, we can be open to the light catching every side
possible. Doing this, we may actually react in an alternative way
than we usually do.
However, if we aren't open to looking at life through fresh eyes, we will find our
reaction exactly the same in situations. Do we want to do that? Or
do we have a drive to grow, to handle experiences in new ways? Could
things that usually bother us now have an opportunity to roll off our
Flip the situation to look at different
perspectives - you may have a little more information to understand what's
going on and react accordingly.
Copyright 2009, Spiritualitygirl
In : Articles