I love looking at A Course in Miracles to gain insight from the lessons that I can apply to my day to day life.  One of the lessons from the Course says "Forgiveness is the key to happiness."  (Lesson 121)


That made me pause.  I know right now there are people that I am struggling to forgive.  There are days that I can forgive an action or a person who did me wrong.  But then there are times, I just can't do it.  I'm holding on to it, letting it grow and fester.  


This non-forgiveness, if I had to create it as an object, would be a big blob of grey.  It would envelop me, making my site unclear and bringing a heaviness to me.  This is what happens when I decide not to forgive.  


How do I do that, though?  How do I work on forgiving?  Sometimes it's looking at the situation for the lessons that I learned, sometimes it's explaining the past life connection and sometimes, it's acknowledging that people are human (including myself) and that stuff, well, it just happens.  Maybe it's a lesson to me to handle things differently or to look at what my responsibility was in the whole scheme of things.


I just know as long as I hold on to the issue, it's not hurting the other person or situation, it's just hurting me.  The other person is going on with their life and here I am, dealing with this big blob of gray.


If it's appropriate, I may tell that person how I'm feeling.  If I can't or decide not to, then I can write a letter than I never mail or talk to a friend about it.  Whatever it is, it's important to release.  Forgiveness can bring a lightness, a happiness, that I may not experience if I can't let go.  And why am I going to deprive myself of that because of another's actions or my own stubborness?


Forgive if it's only purpose is to make your life better - you owe that to yourself.